Caliban (caliban18) wrote in wordware,


Hope mentioned to me that the prompt on wordware was Word. So I thought about words and I thought about a little essay I once wrote about the act of trying to find the right words and struggling with their content. At the time I was feeling rather ... spiritually debased.

And so I thought then about that essay, about the angry prayer that it was and of a few of the other little poems I penned to whomever is out there. Then I considered the concept of worship in general and I wondered for a while why I have so much difficulty with worship. The conclusion that I came to is that until one is afforded real respect, until one is honestly in possession of some well earned status, until one is thrilled to be in one’s own skin, you have no idea how to worship. Because you cannot worship yourself, you cannot really conceive of how to notice largess around you. So I offer these little works penned around 2000 with a request:

I know this is uber personal, but I would love to see other people’s words of worship. Words from those times when you screamed yourself hoarse at the sky for the loss of a loved one. Words from when you turned around and looked over your shoulder and said, "what is it you are trying to tell me?" And even better, words when you have achieved worship. Words that came when at one of those perfect moments. Moments that just seemed to prove the benevolent pattern of things.


Approach to writing:

There is an approach one should take to writing.  Or rather, it is THE approach one should take.  One must creep up behind it.  One must step lightly from footstep to footstep, always wary that writing might hear you coming.  For writing is a fleeting animal.  It does not like to be caught out and made to do your bidding.  Writing would far rather remain out in the wilds of imagination then be put in harness.  There it must toil to do your bidding, to scribe for you, to scream for you, to do all the things that only writing can do and that we desperately want and cannot do without.  We called to writing and it hesitated, then sprang away and settled into the lope of the free. 

So we took this approach.  The approach I am in fact using at this very moment.  There is something very earthy and animal about what I am asking you to do with my approach.  This approach to wily writing must be so careful and snuggle close to the earthy smelling earth and burrow, and craw,l and millepede our way along.  But we will eventually find ourselves next to our quarry.  We will find ourselves within inches of capturing that free little froggie, Writing.

Perhaps we will stay there for a little while, admiring the beast rather then gobbling it up on sight.  Perhaps we will enjoy how the sun glints off its fingers and pen, the way the grass frames itself around the beautiful brute.  The way it twitches in the wind and its delicate nib fingertips move and test the air.  And then it is that you will make your move upon writing, the pounce of the ready-to-be-satiated. 

The pounce and the brief wriggling and then the clutching jerk and then the fearful stillness of waiting as it holds itself still and waiting your words.  And then it will do as you will, oh master predator.  We will do as you will oh master ironist in the sky.  We will let you have us and we will sing your praise.  Because that is how you stalked us.  That is how you approached and stalked and admired and then pounced.  On us!  oh Job-monster in the sky.  And took us and made us do what you want.  And all we wanted was to be free in our own words!

–A Prayer to the Almighty


Our Thanks to You:

Let us give our thank to you, Almighty.

Thank you, that I am not animal.
Thank you, that I am not woman

Thank you, that I am not mortal
Thank you, that I am not immortal

Thank you, that I am not covetous of the immortals.
Thank you, that I am not covetous of the mortals

Thank you, for telling me not to covet the mortals.
Thank you, for telling me not to covet the female mortals.

Thank you, that I am not woman
Thank you, that I am not animal.

Our thanks to you, Almighty.

-- Our Thanks to You.
A Prayer to the Almighty


Our Praises to You:

Let us sing your praises

Oh lord our god you are lordly
oh lord how godly are you.
Oh lord our god you are lorldly
oh lord how gooodly are you.

Oh lord you are mighty godly
Oh lord you are mightily like god
Oh lord you are mighty godly
oh lord you are mightily like you.

Oh lord our god you are very like god
oh lord you are very much like you
oh lord you are so so like god.
Oh god you are far too like god.

Our praises
- A prayer to the Almighty

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